Have you ever noticed that people who are confident, bold and apparently carefree tend to enjoy a fulfilling and abundant life? When you look at those people what do you think? Do you assume that must have had a privileged upbringing, a top-tier education and financial support, or do you admire them for creating the life they have?
When I was growing up in England, the cultural tendency was to knock people who were clearly doing well. For example, when my brother, who is a successful lawyer, bought his first fancy car (a gorgeously sleek Lotus), other drivers visibly bristled. They would challenge him to races at stop-lights, yell insults and even flip him the bird! Isn’t that insane? All because he had the kind of car they would have given their right arm to be driving. I’m sure they made all kinds of snap-judgments about him, but in reality, he went to public school and was brought up in a middle class home by parents who had their fair share of financial challenges.
So, if privilege and opportunity aren’t the reasons for success, what’s the X-factor that makes some people joyful, wealthy and abundant? I’ve learned that it comes down to one thing, and it’s something we can all have. A Positive Mindset. Successful happy people have learned how to use their most powerful tool, the mind, to their advantage, rather than being a slave to it. The great news is that we ALL have the ability to make our mind work for us – it just takes a little knowledge and a lot of practice. When we are able to let go of fear, doubt and regret – all of which come from living in the past or future – we are free to innovate, create and allow success, happiness and wealth into our lives.
Now, I’m no expert and am definitely a work in progress, but I’m working on it and would like to share a few things that are working for me right now. At the end of this post, I’ll ask for your comments. Please do share what works for you.
1) Keep learning
Ever since I learning about the power we have when we use our thoughts and words wisely, I’ve made a conscious effort to keep learning about the subject. I read books, listen to recordings, attend classes and associate myself with people who share my beliefs. For me, keeping on track is a moment by moment affair, so the more I read and learn, the better my odds. I’ll share some books that I’ve found immensely helpful at the end of this post.
2) Practice being in the Now (any which way you can)
The underlying philosophy of establishing and maintaining a wealthy, abundant joyful mindset is mastering the art of being in the moment. For anyone who’s ever tried this, it’s incredibly hard! The human mind seems to default to thinking about everything BUT the present moment. But when we focus on things that may happen in the future or stuff that happened in the past, we open ourselves up to anxiety, fear, doubt and regret. So how do you master the art of being present? Here are a couple of things that I’m trying:
I’m going to come clean here: I’m the woman who squanders her Savasanas thinking about shopping lists, what I’ll make for dinner, calling my mum or any other crap that happens to enter my mind. Meditation does not come easy to me, but then I don’t think it comes easily to anyone, so I’m preservering. I went to a meditation class and was relieved to learn that you can meditate anywhere – in the car while waiting for your kids to come out of school, cooking dinner – anywhere. The trick (it seems) is to find the joy in all things. Sound like a stretch? Let me give you an example: When I’m cooking dinner for my family I can choose to feel one of two ways (1) put upon and resentful that I do all the cooking, or (2) joyful that I have the ability, resources and time to feed my family healthy food. I know from my days living in Harlem, where so many people are on food stamps, that this is indeed a privilege.
I find running a much easier way to meditate, so it tends to be my go-to method. Once I get past the first 20 minutes where my internal voice is grumbling about how my legs feel like lead, my mind starts to ease up. I notice my surroundings, feel the strength and vitality of my body and enjoy feeling the cobwebs being replaced by creative ideas and thoughts. Yoga, swimming or walking might be your thing. Do whatever works for you a few times a week.
3) Lead by example
When I first met my now-husband, Steffen, he was not into ANY of this stuff! I learned that trying to change or convert him in any way was futile, not to mention arrogant, so I decided to just do my own thing and let him do his. Slowly, but surely, he started to pick up the books I left around accidentally-on-purpose. Before long he saw my point about amps, bicycles and deck furniture not being energetically-optimal things to have in, say, the bedroom. Do your own thing and you’ll attract like-minded people naturally.
Of course, I’m just scratching the surface, but these three practices alone have made a huge difference to my life and business.
What about you? How do you feel about mindset and the law of attraction? Are you of the mind that it’s all a load of hooey, or have you experienced transformations or found resources that you’d like to share? Please leave a comment below, I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Here are those book recommendations I mentioned:
A Happy Pocket Full of Money by David Cameron Gikandi
A New Earth: Awakening to your Life’s Purpose by Eckhart Tolle
The Game of Life and How to Play It by Florence Scoval Shinn